100 Dog Jokes To Make Kids laugh
Dog Jokes
1. Why was the dog sitting in the shade?
Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!
2. What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador!
3. How does a dog stop a DVD?
He presses the “paws” button!
4. What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound!
5. Why did the dog bring a ladder to the bar?
Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
6. How do dog catchers get paid?
By the pound!
7. What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A labracadabrador!
8. What do you get if you cross a dog and a calculator?
A friend you can count on!
9. Why don’t dogs make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
10. What do you call a dog that can do martial arts?
A karate lab!
11. What’s a dog’s favorite type of pizza?
Pupperoni!
12. How does a dog stop a video game?
By pressing the “paws” button!
13. What’s a dog’s favorite city?
New Yorkie!
14. What did the dog say to the sandpaper?
“Ruff!”
15. Why don’t dogs use computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of the Windows!
16. What do you call a dog with a surround sound system?
A sub-woofer!
17. What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?
A dog that chases cars and catches them!
18. What did the dog say to the tree?
“Bark!”
19. How do you make a dog float?
Take two scoops of ice cream, add root beer, and a dog!
20. Why don’t dogs play cards in the wild?
There are too many cheetahs!
21. What do you call a dog that can tell time?
A watch dog!
22. Why do dogs never finish school?
They always get marked absent because they’re chasing their tails!
23. What’s a dog’s favorite kind of music?
R&Bark!
24. Why don’t dogs make good doctors?
They can’t operate without their paws!
25. What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway!
26. What do you get if you cross a dog and a telephone?
A golden receiver!
27. Why don’t dogs make good dancers?
They have two left feet!
28. How do you catch a runaway dog?
Hide behind a tree and make a sound like a bone!
29. What do you get if you cross a dog and a calculator?
A friend you can count on!
30. Why did the dog sit in the shade?
Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!
31. What do you call a dog with a Rolex?
A watchdog!
32. What do you call a dog that can tell time?
A watch dog!
33. Why don’t dogs play cards in the wild?
There are too many cheetahs!
34. What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador!
35. What’s a dog’s favorite city?
New Yorkie!
36. What did one flea say to the other flea?
Shall we walk or take a dog?
37. What do you get when you cross a dog and a lion?
A terrified postman!
38. What do you call a dog with a surround sound system?
A sub-woofer!
39. Why did the dog sit in the shade?
Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!
40. What did the dog say to the sandpaper?
“Ruff!”
41. How do you make a dog float?
Take two scoops of ice cream, add root beer, and a dog!
42. What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A labracadabrador!
43. What’s a dog’s favorite kind of music?
R&Bark!
44. Why do dogs always race to the door?
They don’t want to be left out in the cold!
45. How do dog catchers get paid?
By the pound!
46. What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway!
47. Why did the dog go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling “ruff”!
48. What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?
A dog that chases cars and catches them!
49. What do you get if you cross a dog and a frog?
A dog that can lick you from the other side of the road!
50. What do you call a dog with a stereo?
Rap music!
51. Why don’t dogs use computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of the Windows!
52. How do you catch a runaway dog?
Hide behind a tree and make a sound like a bone!
53. What do you get if you cross a dog and a telephone?
A golden receiver!
54. What do you call a dog with no tail and two eyes?
Anything you want, he can’t chase you!
55. Why do dogs never finish school?
They always get marked absent because they’re chasing their tails!
56. What do you call a dog that can do martial arts?
A karate lab!
57. What’s a dog’s favorite type of car?
A fur-rari!
58. How do dog catchers get paid?
By the pound!
59. What do you call a dog with a Rolex?
A watchdog!
60. Why don’t dogs play cards in the wild?
There are too many cheetahs!
61. What did the dog say to the sandpaper?
A collie-flower!
62. How do you make a dog float?
Take two scoops of ice cream, add root beer, and a dog!
63. What do you get if you cross a dog and a calculator?
A friend you can count on!
64. Why did the dog sit in the shade?
Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!
65. What do you get if you cross a dog and a daisy?
“Ruff!”
66. What’s a dog’s favorite kind of music?
R&Bark!
67. Why do dogs always race to the door?
They don’t want to be left out in the cold!
68. How do dog catchers get paid?
By the pound!
69. What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway!
70. Why did the dog go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling “ruff”!
71. What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?
A dog that chases cars and catches them!
72. What’s a dog’s favorite type of pizza?
Pupperoni!
73. What do you call a dog with a stereo?
Rap music!
74. Why don’t dogs use computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of the Windows!
75. How do you catch a runaway dog?
Hide behind a tree and make a sound like a bone!
76. What do you get if you cross a dog and a telephone?
A golden receiver!
77. What do you call a dog with no tail and two eyes?
Anything you want, he can’t chase you!
78. Why do dogs never finish school?
They always get marked absent because they’re chasing their tails!
79. What do you call a dog that can do martial arts?
A karate lab!
80. What’s a dog’s favorite type of car?
A fur-rari!
81. Why don’t dogs make good scientists?
Because they always have a lab report!
82. What do you call a dog that can tell time?
A watch dog!
83. Why don’t dogs play cards in the wild?
There are too many cheetahs!
84. What did the dog say to the sandpaper?
“Ruff!”
85. How do you make a dog float?
Take two scoops of ice cream, add root beer, and a dog!
86. What do you get if you cross a dog and a calculator?
A friend you can count on!
87. Why did the dog sit in the shade?
Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!
88. What do you call a dog that can play the piano?
Beethoven!
89. What’s a dog’s favorite kind of music?
R&Bark!
90. Why do dogs always race to the door?
They don’t want to be left out in the cold!
91. How do dog catchers get paid?
By the pound!
92. What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway!
93. Why did the dog go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling “ruff”!
94. What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?
A dog that chases cars and catches them!
95. Why was the dog a great musician?
Because he had perfect “pooch”!
96. What do you call a dog with a stereo?
Rap music!
97. Why don’t dogs use computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of the Windows!
98. How do you catch a runaway dog?
Hide behind a tree and make a sound like a bone!
99. What do you get if you cross a dog and a telephone?
A golden receiver!
100. What do you call a dog with no tail and two eyes?
Anything you want, he can’t chase you!
I hope these jokes brought a smile to your face!